September 18th, 2008 Kid’s ranch and tim’s musings (via postie)

Published Date Author: , March 24th, 2010

Bookmark this category
Thursday, Sept 18, 2008

Dear friends,

1. Housing. 2. Project 3. Musings

1. One property related prayer answered, 3 to go. Our family got the house we had prayed for. In two weeks, we moved, and are still reeling in shock and exhaustion. But the new house has room to breathe, room to grow, lots of storage, a barn, room for ministry, and lots of other cool features. There were God fingerprints on our getting it, and we stepped out in faith to get it. The kids and Karen all love the place, and I am too exhausted to feel much of anything. Have been trying like crazy to get Thorn Creek finished/cleared out, so that it is completely presentable to interested investors, and so we can quit paying rent on it each month (on top of the house in Elk Creek AND the new house). My personal dilemma deals with feeling like I’ve become nothing more than a “white trash” pack rat when my goal was simply to gather and store stuff in preparation for a ranch opening that hasn’t happened. This weighs on me. “Stuff” can become a prison, and I’m unsure how to be the best steward of all this “stuff” that is taking forever to deal with, but all of which was gathered with a specific end goal in mind. I guess the faith part comes in where I go ahead and store it, believing that God still has a plan for a ranch, instead of ditching it all. What is it all you ask? Beds. Wood stoves. Construction materials (pipe, wire, shingles, lumber, shower stalls, sinks, HVAC ducting, etc). Propane appliances (dryers, stoves, refrigerators, freezers, etc). Firewood. Off-grid power generation equipment. Three vehicles. Two 35 foot trailers. And the list goes on, all of it originally intended for specific purposes in building/rebuilding the ranch.

So the first property related prayer request is that we know what to do with the Elk Creek house, since we signed a year lease on it, and I don’t care to break my word to the owner by breaking the lease. Preferably, we’d like to get a family in there that is dedicated to the ranch project as well, that can help cover its expenses, so that we can team up with them. There are several people that we are considering for this, we’re just praying for direction.

2. Thorn Creek ranch. The deal to sell it to another party did indeed fall through. So it’s back on the market. I am still clearing storage stuff out (it’s slow going when I can only get up there with a pickup truck and small trailer once or twice a week typically because of intensive schedules elsewhere). I have to return the keys to the owners by the end of this month, so I am on a deadline. They have been gracious about previous deadlines, but it doesn’t feel good to keep sliding. We need to have it completely empty by Sept 31′st. End of story. This is our second property related prayer request.

The other property we had targeted for the foster home community is still in limbo. The owner has not returned our calls. Not sure why, but if nothing happens soon, we’ll prolly let the idea go, while assuming that God just didn’t open that door for us either. This is our third property related prayer request.

We have someone willing to help us finish refiling our 501-c3. I just need to find the time to breathe to do it. This is both an answer to prayer and another prayer request.

Todd has returned from Afghanistan, and we are thankful for his safe return.

3. Musings. There’s been a lot going on in my head this month. I already mentioned one of them, stewardship, in my section about moving Thorn Creek storage stuff.

Another involves walking in faith in a bigger way than I have ever done before, especially concerning this new house. It is only because God worked behind the scenes that we were able to get it. We will continue to walk in faith to remain here.

A third involves my career and building an internet business big enough to support my family and a ranch ministry.

A fourth involves finding the balance between living in fear of the worst case economic or disaster scenario and preparing for it (or knowing what the future holds as prophesied and being ready for it), and living completely carefree in the moment without any thought for what tomorrow may hold. There is an aspect of faith, and stewardship, in this as well.

A fifth revolves around inviting people to come here to work with us on a dream, when in my own humanity, I can’t even see how the dream will materialize (it will only happen if God does it). Dare I do that?

A sixth deals with Hurricane Ike cleanup. I have been on standby for almost three weeks now, waiting for a call to go to Texas for hurricane cleanup through the same company that has sent me to do base camp support for the 2 fires in New Mexico that I was on earlier this year. The waiting is nerve wracking sometimes…

7th. I have been spending some time with Terry Branch, the latest ranch related arrival in Idaho. He and his wife and 2 kids arrived several weeks ago from Maine (led here by God, not me), are staying in Emmett for the moment, and are interested in how we can work together as a team to make the ranch happen. He’s a neat guy and we get along well, but He needs our prayers as he tries to re-establish his family here somewhere.

And the biggy…

Prayer.

When I recently pondered all the forward momentum we had as a ranch project during the first year I was up here in Thorn Creek (the first six months especially), and then compared it to the molasses I have dealt with ever since, I asked God why the change.

Then I heard several very pointed messages on prayer. They spoke to me. And it finally dawned on me.

My prayer life was the missing component. During the first year I was up here, my life was characterized by prayer. I was involved with two different Bible Studies and prayer meeting groups in Boise every week. Many of these impromptu prayer meetings turned into spontaneous all night prayer meetings where we were on our knees before God, crying out to Him, worshipping Him, interceding for each other, and in general, assaulting heaven with our prayers. We fasted. We prayed. We saw results. And among other things, we saw prayer request after prayer request answered regarding the ranch, usually within days or weeks of our asking. People were excited, I was excited, we had a LOT of forward momentum, and nothing stood in our way.

Then misunderstandings in the group happened, feelings got hurt, and just like a bomb had gone off, both groups that I was involved with evaporated almost overnight. With it went our prayer time. I still prayed on my own of course, but that focused, intense, continual, all night corporate prayer went away. And soon thereafter, it began to feel like wading through molasses to try to get anything to happen with the ranch. I felt wounded myself as well, and that hurt my personal prayer life as well. Momentum slowed even more.

I would hazard to say that I have never returned to that intense prayer walk that I experienced the first 6 months that I lived up here and worked on this project (the time that we had the most forward momentum as a project). I need to change that. So Karen and I have been spending a lot more time in prayer together the last two weeks, and we are starting to see a distinct difference happening in the moods and attitudes of our family and some of our family prayers. It’s neat to see.

And just WHY is it so hard just to sit down and spend time with God? It shouldn’t be.

I have come to the distinct (some would say it’s a no-brainer) conclusion that if I want anything truly good and lasting to happen in my life, my family, and my dreams, it will only happen when I spend LOTS of time with God, both meditating on scriptures, listening to His quiet voice, and pouring my heart out to Him in prayer. It is my conclusion that if I/you want my/your life to truly count for anything in this world, it will only happen when God directs it (He wants to change the world too), and that will only happen when I/you spend LOTs of focused time with Him.

With that said, I would covet your prayers as well right now in our time of transitions and crossroads.

Sincerely,

-Tim, Karen, and Kids Benedict

PS. After praying this morning for a long time with Karen, we had 2 direct answers to prayers today. God is real. :-)

Share

No comments as yet.

Leave Your Comment  Leave a comment

All fields marked with "*" are required.